Dealing with colleagues who criticize you or your work

This week, let’s talk about how to deal with colleagues who criticize you or your work; a situation that’s probably happened to all of us at one point. Here are a few comments I’ve received from newsletter readers in recent months:

–I work with an interpreter whose A language is my B language. This person is great at the job, but constantly makes little digs about the fact that I’m not a native speaker of the language we’re interpreting into, asking me things like, “Do you understand what I’m saying?” or even giving me a list of errors that I made during the assignment. Maybe this person is trying to help, but it rattles my confidence and gets under my skin.

–I have a colleague who is generally really enjoyable to work with, but who makes comments about my work in a way that feels rude and condescending. I’m the first one to admit when I make a mistake, but this person’s tone could really use some improvement.

First, know that you’re not alone in these kinds of situations. One truth about translators and interpreters is that we enjoy being right about everything, and that’s part of why we’re good at the job. Criticism from colleagues is never easy to hear, but it can sometimes point out an area in which you need to improve, or something you could do differently. Here’s how I’d go about dealing with these types of situations:

• First, know that if a colleague habitually criticizes you, or does so in a way that feels condescending, it’s about them and their insecurities, not about you. Maybe the person is a better translator or interpreter than you! But if they constantly have to make that point, it’s either because they build themselves up by putting other people down, or they’re so insecure that they have to establish a “pecking order” with everyone they work with. This doesn’t necessarily make the subtle (or not-so-subtle) digs easier to handle, but it gives the situation some context.
• Second, remind yourself that it’s OK to be right about something and just let it slide. It’s never fun to be called out as wrong…in a situation where you’re actually right. This happened to me in a professional situation recently, where I was sure that a colleague was going against the instructions we had received from the client. After several back-and-forth interactions, I just said to myself, I know that I’m right about this, and it doesn’t really matter. The world is not going to stop turning because of this, and I need to just let it drop and move on.
• Third, consider whether what this person is saying is true. This sounds basic, but it’s a step we often skip. Is this person right? Is there a skill that you need to work on so that you don’t make this kind of mistake again? Do you need to up your language game in general? In my family, we have a saying: There’s a shred of truth in every unhinged rant, and the same rule applies in professional situations.
• Fourth, decide whether this situation is worth addressing, or not. Consider factors such as: How often do you have to deal with this person? Is it possible to just smile and nod and move on? Is it worth discussing it with them? Is this person really trying to help, or is it about their ego issues?
• If you do decide to address this person’s behavior, expect it to be awkward. Sometimes, people just don’t realize how their comments are perceived, or it’s also possible that you’re particularly sensitive to what they say or how they say it. More often, people whose communication style is harsh and condescending tend to get defensive or turn the criticism back on you. You have to be prepared for this to happen, and feel that it is worth the risk.

You can also take this as a moment to consider how and when you give feedback to colleagues. Some things, in my opinion, are out of our league as freelancers. For example, if you really feel that a colleague’s skills are so weak that they should not be working on the project you’re working on, you need to address that with the client, not with them (in my opinion). Yet, we can all use tips like:

• It is absolutely OK to correct a colleague in a “you have spinach in your teeth” kind of way. We’ve all benefited from more experienced colleagues pulling us aside and giving us some helpful corrections, even if they were hard to hear at the time.
• Keep it short and straightforward. This sounds basic, but in my experience, the lengthier you make the explanation of your criticism, the more it sounds like a rant. Keep it brief. “Hi there! I was just looking over your section of the translation and I noticed that a couple of terms (insert examples) don’t follow the glossary. Maybe have a look before you submit that section?”
• Try to make observations instead of judgments: “Your tone is too informal” is a subjective comment. Instead, give an example: “For this formal type of document, it seems to me that we might want to use “lessor of the apartment” rather than “landlady.”

Most of all, I feel like we can all get better at managing our own egos, emotions, and our ability to respond thoughtfully instead of react defensively. Daily meditation (I use the Calm app) has really helped me with this! I hope that these tips are helpful to you as well!